Holy Moly Week 5

SO far this week has been a roller coaster!

Today we had a scare, I woke up and I was bleeding. Panic and devastation hit me immediately. I of course felt like a disappointment, but more so sad for my IP’s. I thought about their time, money, hopes and dreams that went into this and how this is going to make them feel. I never want to make someone feel like that. I envisioned this as a happy journey; it’s been more emotional than anticipated.  I couldn’t bring myself to call them, especially not in the state that I was in. I immediately called the doctors who said it was most likely a miscarriage and they had me come in for an ultrasound. I have since not had any bleeding and hope it stays that way!

The ultrasound was better than anticipated. I did not have a miscarriage; therefore there is a possibility that this can still go on to be a successful pregnancy. The doctor said she had seen it go both ways. I’ve talked to other surro’s who also had bleeding and everything came out fine. ….The doctor did find something surprising…TWINS! They were both in their sacs where they were supposed to be and their sacs were measuring good size. I really hope both of these little ladies make it through!!

Unfortunately at 5 weeks there is not yet a heartbeat therefore we will know more in 2 weeks at our ultrasound. The embryos are now beginning to look more like tadpoles. And are the size of sesame seeds. The brain and heart are beginning to form.  They’ve been getting their nutrients from lots of yummy food including kale, quinoa, lots of fruit and veggies, the recommended serving of whitefish, and one strawberry cupcake… oops.

I asked the doctor if there is anything I can do to assure this pregnancy and she said no. Unfortunately exercise, bed rest and stress are not factors that will cause any change when manipulated.

I’m staying positive that there will be 2 little McM’s here in 8 months. I had a feeling it was twins, the other night I was snuggled into my freshly washed sheets when I sneezed, wrong move.  I peed everywhere, and not a little bit. I changed the sheets while laughing at myself, thinking I’m so blaming that on the pregnancy. I’ve also been super sensitive and cry for no reason. When my daughter asked me why I was sad I told her they were happy tears, because I love her so much. She told me I was weird and ran off to the play room half naked!

Hoping for a smoother week 6, thinking happy thoughts!